It's Christmas time again. Christmas was my favorite holiday as a child. The excitement of waking up early on Christmas morning to see what mom and dad or my brothers and sisters bought for me. The excitement of having so many gifts under the tree and finally getting the chance to unwrap them. I would guess for the past 7-8 years, this excitement is not there anymore.
I still love Christmas, but everything that I have known Christmas to be as a child has either diminished or no longer exists. All my brothers and sisters have grown up, live out on their own, and some of them have kids now. As the youngest, it is hard for me to see things change so drastically, but what can I do?
The economy has hit my family so hard that it is hard to adapt. Especially because we live in Michigan. The GM crisis hit my family the most because my dad worked at Delphi for over 30 years and was forced into retirement. Christmas does not involve gifts anymore, just faces.
I sometimes feel like love does not exist anymore. Most of us are around, but there is one sibling who, I feel, wants nothing to do with the family. When Christmas comes around, I cannot count on seeing my sibling or the children, and if everyone is not there, I feel like its not complete. Now that I am older, I do not care much for gifts, just family. Without someone, its not the same. I will never understand this situation.
For the most part, I am ready to come home for Christmas. The scary part is I do not know what to expect. Every year its different. When I think about it, sometimes it hurts.
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